The Straw Story

Dont get me wrong. I’m all for the straw banning.

Cuma selama ni tak pernah terasa kesan tak ada straw tu. Mostly because I’m a hot drinker. Dan bila sesekali terasa nak minum cold drink aku just anggap macam minum dekat rumah. Tak pakai straw pun kan kalau minum air sejuk-sejuk dekat rumah kan?

Well, until today. Guess what?

Yup. Sup tulang! Haha. Tak berjaya nak menyedut tanpa straw, maka aku ketuk-ketuk jelah gearbox tu sampai terkeluar (apa nama benda dalam tulang tu ek?) 

Berjaya keluar, tapi bila nampak bentuk isi tu, tak adalah perasaan beriye nak makan tu sangat 😅 Dan memang comot habislah baju hahaha. Kalau makan kat luar mungkin tak buatlah perangai ketuk-ketuk tulang tu kot.

Jadi nampaknya nak kena belilah straw besi tu.

Too Good To Be True

I have the coolest boss. Never ever thought that I would be able to say this statement. But yeah, my current boss is cool. He acts upon our escalation, he backs us up, he treats us equally, well, what more do we need from a boss.

And, when some thing is too good, it surely must comes with a twist. He just tendered his resignation 😭😭

During my probation evaluation, he did put some good words about me. But now that he’s resigned, I feel like those words are not valid anymore.

So that’s it. Some things are just too good to be true, right?

Baju Raya 2019

So it’s that time of the year again. (Or is it actually still too early?😂)

I went through a few IGs for their Raya collection, only to be disappointed with this year’s collection. Okay, I am obviously no fashionita, I just want a decent classic kebarung riau. Is that too much to ask?

Haha. Tu pun nak emo. It’s fine. Nanti pergi cari dekat Angsana or Galleria (kalau rajin). And owh, selamat mengganti puasa for those who are still struggling to ganti.. 💪🏽💪🏽

2019

This would be the first post for 2019 although I didn’t do any proper goodbye for 2018, sebab malam tadi tertidur kepenatan huhu.

Azam tahun baru? To be honest, I’m still working on it eheh. Masih listing down apa nak achieve in 2019. For 2018, some was achieved, some was not.

Yang paling aku ingat - in 2018 aku finally dapat offer at dua company yang aku dah lama nak dari zaman mula-mula kerja dulu. Been attending interviews for the companies since 2007 seingat aku, and finally, after fouth and third interview, dapat jugak offer.

Enough about 2018, it was already yesteryear.

And as the cliche goes - cepatnya masa berlalu.

Happy new year, everyone, have a wonderful one ❤️

Salon

Dah lama tak ke salon rambut. The truth is, I always feel uneasy about the idea of going to all sorts of beauty care, be it spa, hair salon and whatnot. The main reason is because of my low self-esteem, so I don’t like it when people go highlighting all of my flaws that I am already full aware of. Which leads to the second reason - due to the ‘defects’ it would be so easy for the masseuse or hairsylist to promote their services/products. Which annoyed me like hell. Argghh. 

Weekend lepas sempat curi masa kejap pergi potong rambut, and as I expected, yang potong rambut tu ‘analyzed’ my hair and promoted lah segala mala  service/product yang diorang ada. No surprise there. Tapi tak tahan mendengarkan the prices. Semua harga RM300 and above. Selamba je bagitahu harga sekian sekian macam benda tu perkara biasa. Haha. Memang tak lah nak ambik pakej treatment seribu lebih tu.

Rasanya kalau beli produk bodyshop dan buat semua sendiri okay kot. I mean untuk rakyat marhaen macam aku. Okaylah, tu je nak bebel.

Aging Factor

Entah kenapa hari ni tersentap pulak dengan statement pasal orang tua-orang muda ni. Mungkin faktor usia, eheh.

Yang sebetulnya aku selalu ada kerisauan bab-bab dressing, sebab aku mostly masih stick to the same old dressing style like when I was in my early 20’s. Masih pakai jeans, tshirt, sneakers, and my bags collection pun masih sama style macam zaman study dulu. Haha, bila taip ni rasa macam selekehnya lah makcik ni. Berbalik isu risau tadi - risau takut nampak macam orang tua tak sedar diri dressing macam budak-budak. Gitu. Tapi selalunya aku sedapkan hati, asalkan tutup aurat dan kita sendiri selesa dalam pakaian tu, lantaklah apa orang nak kata kan?

Isu sentap tadi ada kaitan dengan perihal dressing ni. Tapi contradicted sungguh dengan kerisauan aku selama ni. Aku malas nak taip panjang-panjang pasal tu, cuma nak point out the point yang aku boleh pulak ‘tersentap’ dengan statement orang pasal ‘dressing orang muda-orang tua’. 

Nampak sangat makcik dah tua, dah cepat sentap. Haishhh..

Okay, tak de point sungguh post ni, makcik saja nak membebel (in a subtle way-lah konon). Sekian bebelan.

The Media Social in Dark Blue

I activated my Facebook recently, stayed active for a while - added a few new friends and even posted a “What’s On Your Mind” thing (why don’t I just say ‘post a status’ 🙄), and owh, not to mention all the stalking to ‘catch up’ and ‘keep up’ with.

*sigh. Spent Wasted such a good time there.

So, I guess it really is not for me anymore. I’m better off without it.

Matter of the Heart

Why has it been almost 3 weeks since I last wrote in here? And I actually type writed, instead of wrote in the last phrase *sigh. Something is quite wrong with me *sigh again.

I was not busy at all. I had things in mind that I want to write about, but I just didn’t feel like writing. Haha, same old excuses.

I wanted to write about Ketupat Palas. There was a story about ketupat palas. Well, not really a story, more of a thought, actually. But, haihh, don’t really how to. Haha. So will get to that on the next next post.

Something had changed in these past 3 weeks. I realise that as I get older, change is hard. Change is sad. Change is depressive. I didnt really know how to deal with change lately. So I just keep telling myself to keep istighfar, praying that the heavy feeling in my heart would be lifted out. Alhamdulillah, after 3 days, I got better. And I’m fine now. Alhamdulillah.

So the point is, Allah is the owner of our heart, He is the turner of the heart. So always, always turn to Him. And ask Him.

Of The Good and The Bad

Yesterday was everything that had always made me questioned myself. Questions like, the reason of my existence in this world, blablabla😔But I’d rather not write all those questions down. It’s not healthy, I know. So, anyways, among those that made me feel like hell,  somehow, there were goodness out of nowhere, when I expected the worst to come.

Bila orang lain buat arrangement yang aku kena handle tapi aku tak aware of the consequences, dan buatkan aku terpaksa went against all odds. Kena marah dengan ramai orang due to the arrangement (which was made by others), ditambah dengan last minute bail-out, nak kena arrange new person in charge in such a short notice. Lepas tu nak kena buy time, which was not easy for someone who doesnt like to talk like me.

Almost every person I called scolded me, some even just hung up on me. But I didnt cry. I had no time to cry yesterday. Masa tu cuma fikir macam mana nak setelkan benda tu je. 

And when I said sorry to the person who’s primarily affected by the whole cazy and stupid arrangement, guess what he said? “Don’t worry about it. You orang baik, I appreciate your time”

Well, I’m crying by the time I’m writing this. Masa tu memang rasa comforted bila dapat dengar perkataan yang baik-baik after some harsh ones. Because that was exactly what I needed at the moment. No, not the pujian or appreciation, just some undertanding. He had every reason to be upset and mengamuk, but he chose not to. Big respect.

Bila type ni barulah rasa sebak. Sampainyalah hati diorang tu semua. Huhu. Entahlah, aku pun malas nak fikir sangat pasal orang-orang yang marah-marah aku padahal aku pun dalam keadaan tersepit jugak. Tak pelah, aku tak nak pikir pasal diorang dah. Sebab di sebalik orang- orang yang disrespectful tu, Allah turunkan lebih ramai orang yang baik-baik, yang helpful, easy-going dan menyenangkan urusan aku. Alhamdulillah. Sobsob, sebak lagi..

Selain individu yang aku sebut kat atas tu, ada satu team yang senang sangat nak bekerjasama bila aku mintak support dari diorang. Sekali call je terus datang, tak ada banyak songeh macam team yang lagi satu. Sampai aku rasa macam, eh, biar betul? Aku doakan Allah permudahkan urusan mereka yang memudahkan urusan orang lain.

“If you keep thinking too much of what’s bad, you might end up losing what’s good” -Good Witch-

Yes, I should always keep this in mind. It’s not even worth it to keep thinking about the bad people who hurts you without feeling any guilt.

I guess, I found a little comfort in telling myself that - if people treat you like trash, that is actually a reflection of themselves. Period.

Owh, speaking of Good Witch, season 4 dah keluar kat Netflix. Yeayyy!  Bolehlah marathon cuti 4 hari ni.

The Unsaid

Somethings are better left unsaid, they say.

Which is absolutely true. People would assume they know what’s in your heart based on how you choose to appear on the outside. And as for me, I dont like drama. And I’m bad at expressing myself. And I dont like explaining myself too much.

Most of the times I just go along with what people assume about me. That is much easier and saves up a lot of energy, at least for me. Because dealing with the truth, especially of my own failure is really, really exhausting. 

I did cry inside, but I just laughed it out. Well, this feeling of failing at something is not funny, and it’s far from happy. But like they say, somethings are really better left unsaid.

So, yeah..

The One Job

Sometimes, your job is to ensure that people get the credit they deserve.

And as for you, the credit is out of question. Because it is your job.

The Redeem Month

Redeem list:

• GSC 2 free tickets
• TGV 2 free tickets plus popcorn kot
• Vivo
• Ikea (ok, ni bukan redeem, cuma boleh collect point x3)

Haha, tak banyak pun rupanya. 

E-Mail

Situasi 1:

Bila kita tak (sempat) baca e-mail;

“Kenalah baca e-mail. Kenalah alert sikit”

Situasi 2:

Bila orang tak baca e-mail;

“Mana boleh main e-mail je. Ingat orang baca e-mail ke?”

Haihhh.. Adat dunia.

The Philosophy of Tauhu Bergedil

Teringin nak makan tauhu bergedil. Kebetulan dapat cabut awal, sempatlah menyinggah ke pasar malam.

Tapi dah tertulis rezeki tauhu bergedil tu tak ada untuk aku hari ni. Walaupun dapat pi pasar malam hari ni, kakak yang jual tu pulak tak ada menjual. 

Yup, life is like that.

Thank You

When someone said it straight to my face what I’ve already know all along.

I appreciate your bluntness, sir, although it’s so not healthy for my soul. *sigh. But right now, I don’t even have the strength to cry.

I don’t cry over stupid things, I guess.

The Name

I have such a long name. 3 words, or 6, if includes my father’s name. Other than the length issue, I will always have to answer the ‘kerabat’ question which my answer would always be ‘not related’. Malas nak bukak cerita sejarah, lagipun belum khatam habis lagi bab susur- galur tu.

The truth is, I don’t like it when people call me by my first name by default. I would prefer to be called Izza. Nurul would be acceptable lah jugak.  Tapi tolonglah jangan panggil Tengku 🙄

Okay, tu je nak bebel.

The Arrogant Ones

How can people be so arrogant? Do they think they’re above others? Better than others? Selfish? Or just plain confident? Or perhaps, super-confident?

While me, on the other hand, have so much empathy, I guess. I can’t bring myself to be one because all I do is putting myself in others’ shoes. Demmit.

How I Met Your Mother

Netflix dah ada HIMYM. So boleh marathon untuk kali kedua (kononnya). Tapi rupanya tak kuasa dah nak re-watch. I ended up watching the very first episode and the last 4 episodes of season 9 je.

“You will be shocked kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That's why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you do something about it.” -Ted-

But sometimes, there are not really much to be done, I guess. When it’s time to part ways, all we can do is reminiscing the good old times (as long as it’s not faded away, that is). The past is past, no matter how much we want to re-live it. 

The truth is, I miss a lot of people.

Nikmat Yang Ditarik

Don’t remember if I ever did blog about this. I have this problem, from time to time. And if I remember it correctly, for the past recent years, it had been like once a year.

Not to whine about it, but it actually hits that I have always take it for granted - the appetite. Because once I lose it, kalau orang hidang laksa Thai (the one with green curry) depan mata pun, aku tak mampu nak telan *nangis. Okay, laksa Thai is my current favourite food. 

Even tengok makanan pun kadang-kadang ada rasa nak throw up. Haishhh.. Buat aku terfikir jugak, mungkin ni macam 10% of what preggie mommies yang ada morning sickness yang teruk-teruk tu rasa kot. 

Dengan ada gastritis problem ni, jadi double trouble bila tak dapat nak makan ni. Itulah dia, nikmat yang kita tak berapa nak bersyukur selama ni, Allah nak tarik bila-bila masa je kan

Hopefully, my appetite’ll come back pretty soon.

Perihal Raya 2018 (Part II)

Raya kedua hari tu pergi melawat nenek saudara belah mak, dia kena second stroke, dah tak boleh bercakap, tak boleh bangun.

Sayu sangat masa salam, dia pandang aku lama, rasanya dia tak kenal kot sebab jarang sangat jumpa bila dah besar panjang ni.

Patutlah kita ni diwajibkan pergi melawat orang sakit. Bila tengok keadaan Tok Su terasa ada satu keinsafan dalam diri. Betapa selama ni tak jaga kesihatan (esp in terms of food intake and exercise) dan juga bab-bab ibadah - betapa beruntungnya kita yang masih mampu solat dalam keadaan sempurna. Dan dari segi komunikasi pulak, adakah kita ni gunakan nikmat dapat mendengar dan bercakap tu dengan benda-benda yang baik dan bermanfaat sahaja. 

Semoga Tok Su dipermudahkan segala urusan, dikurangkan kesakitan dan diberi kesembuhan.