Friday, September 22, 2017

Not The One

Not The One

I wanted you to hear me
to see me
to value me
to adore me


but I understand now


Even if I write the saddest song
it will never get to your heart
because I am not the one you hear

I could pass you by everyday
but you will never look at me
because I am not the one you see

I could heal your wound
but you will never mind me
because I am not the one you value

I could be by your side
for the rest of eternity
but I will never make you laugh
because I am not the one you adore

I understand that now
and it's not your fault
and it's not me, either


I understand
I am not the one
and that's why I don't matter.




Disclaimer: All poems may be or may not be from my own experience. Some are merely from observationsJust chill, don't speculate 😝😝

Thursday, September 21, 2017

Making Peace with Those Who Forget

There are certain people in our life that we would do and sacrifice anything as long as they are okay. 

But sadly, for some reason, eventually, they just forget. Or leave.

As much as we want them to stay, we just have to learn to let go. Because no matter how hard we try, some people aren't meant to stay. If it's not by choice, it would be by fate. 

But it doesn't have to be a bad thing. All you have to tell yourself, that all of the hardships and sacrifices that you were willing to undergo with/for them meant something. That you were a good person. That you were capable of putting aside your own comfort for other's sake. That you were a strong person. someone with the heart of gold.

So don't regret it. As for the people who forgot about it, and forgot about you,  then, obviously it's their loss, for not wanting to be around someone who is selfless, who's willing to undergo storms with/for them.

After all, it's not your fault that people change. You can still be that good person you once were by making peace with that fact. And then, move on. And continue making this world a little better for everyone else around you.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Small Job vs Small Man

"There is no small job, only small man"

Tak dapat nak letak kredit sebab tak tahu siapa punya quote ni.

Peringatan untuk diri sendiri sebab selalu lost passion in my jobs sebab aku ended up fikir kerja aku tak penting, tak ada value dsb. And that thoughts surely will lead to de-motivation.

Jadi quote tu memang kena la setepek dengan muka aku. What a small person I am. 

So hopefully I would be able to reset my mind. Even if my job doesn't seem to have direct contribution to society in specific (like doctors), but then again, there is no small job. Every job is important. 

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

This Screwed-Up society

Al-fatihah untuk semua mangsa dan keluarga mangsa kebakaran Pusat Tahfiz Darul Quran Ittifaqiyah. Dan untuk kita yang lain juga, semoga kita semua mampu mencari penawar untuk masyarakat yang sudah terbukti sakit tenat. 

Ada banyak benda daripada keseluruhan peristiwa ni yang tak mampu dihadamkan oleh akal. 

From the day one of the news. Pasal video yang direkod semasa kejadian, masa anak-anak tu cuba selamatkan diri. I couldn't bring myself to watch it, I hope it's not true. Because if it is, I cannot imagine what a steel-hearted the person who's recording it is. I mean, takkanlah sanggup rekod sementara melihat tangan-tangan mintak tolong tu? Walaupun mungkin tak ada apa yang boleh dibuat untuk tolong but still, recording a video? 

And then - the obsession of our society to spread out info/news yang belum tentu betul atau tidak. 

And as for the kids who were involved with the crime, I don't want to write about that.  It's beyond insanity.

The blaming game will not do any good now.

It all goes back to the core of the human beings. If it is not HUMANITY, then what are we now? 

Monday, September 18, 2017

Macam Belangkas

Ni bukan macam belangkas. Ini memang belangkas. Hehe.


Pakcik yang tangkap ni nak bagi free je belangkas ni, tapi iols tak pandai nak buang racun dia tu maka tak ambik lah. Kalau dia bagi yang dah masak, memang terus ambik.

Yang saiz besar tu betina, yang kecik jantan. Dan aku baru tahu nama dia in English - Horseshoe Crab. Comel betul nama dia.

Okay dah, sekian pelajaran Biologi Marin hari ini.

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Tips Masakan Tahan Lama

These tips I got from observations and also conversations with the elderly. So let me summarize in one article.

Tahan lama tu bukanlah maksudnya tahan berminggu-minggu macam tu. Maksudnya bolehlah tahan semalaman tanpa dimasukkan dalam fridge. Gitu.

1. Untuk nasi, basuh beras bersih-bersih sampai air warna putih. Selain nasi jadi tahan lama, arwah tok saudara  aku pernah bagitahu ni tips dia untuk awet muda. Tapi serius, arwah memang awet muda.

2. Masa nak serve makanan tu, make sure semua bekas-bekas tu betul-betul kering sebelum letak makanan dalam tu.

3. Lepas masak jangan terus tutup kuali/periuk. Bagi asap-asap tu reda dulu ehehe. Maaflah, tak reti nak buat ayat macam mana 😬

4. Tumis bahan-bahan kisar (contoh: bawang putih, halia, bawang merah, cili boh) lama sikit.

5. Jangan campur-campur senduk.

Tu je yang teringat buat masa ni. Tadi rasa-rasa macam banyak, rupanya lima je ke?  😂😂😂 Tengoklah, kalau ada lagi nanti aku tambah lagi.

Thursday, September 14, 2017

Colors of Me



I am black and white

and you, 
are the colors to my life.





Pic: Nikon D90 and photoshopped.

Disclaimer: All poems may be or may not be from my own experience. Some are merely from observationsJust chill, don't speculate 😝😝

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Mencerap Bulan

Okay, tipu. Tak cerap bulan pun. Cuma dapat tengok Zuhal dan bintang *tak ingat nama.

Dapat tahu pasal tempat ni masa kat Matta Fair hari tu. Memandangkn makcik seumur hidup tak pernah pergi Port Dickson dan harga resort (sekali dengan Balai Cerap Teluk Kemang visit dalam pakej) tak sampai RM200, maka grablah deal tersebut.


Klana Beach Resort tu okaylah, bersih, ada pool dan syariah compliant memandangkan it's wholly owned by Majlis Agama Islam Negeri Sembilan. Mana nak cari resort ada provide telekung sejadah semua kan?




Waktu dibenarkan masuk balai cerap ni pukul 1130 malam. Siap tertidur-tidur lagi sementara nak tunggu 1130 tu. nasib baiklah terjaga 1115, kalau tak burn jelah. Mamai-mamai tu gigihlah naik tangga sampai tingkat 4.

Lepas dah tengok bintang yang tak ingat nama tu, officers dekat balai cerapan tu ada lagi brief dan tunjuk gambar yang diorang ambik - gambar planet-planet, lightning, constellation, etc etc..

Balai cerap ni betul-betul depan resort ni je, dalam kawasan yang sama. Aku sempat jugaklah baca funfacts tempat ni, antaranya - balai cerapan ni adalah yang tertinggi merekodkan anak bulan di Malaysia.

The telescope

Sejadah, telekung, kain pelikat provided


The view in front of the resort:



Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Something About The Rain



Something About The Rain


There is something about the rain

    and it's not about the wet clothes
                                  or umbrellas
                              or the coldness


There is something about the rain

I don't know how it is attached to the past
but while I sit here watching the drops
I smell the scent of the old days

of people who's come and gone
of love that's lived and then died
of hope that's ignited and blown off

of happiness
and of sorrow

of the old days.



Disclaimer: All poems may be or may not be from my own experience. Some are merely from observationsJust chill, don't speculate 😝😝

Thursday, September 7, 2017

Menjejak Daging Salai

Gara-gara tengok TV, kalau tak silap Majalah Tiga kot. Lepas tu kemaruk nak merasa daging salai yang diperkatakan ramai tu.

Aku save siap-siap nama tempat tu - Kampung Kundur Hulu. Tapi nama kedai yang featured on TV tu tak captured pulak, jadi bila sampai kampung tu main agak-agak jelah.

Yang kami jumpa ni, kalau dari arah Port Dickson, dia kedai pertama yang kita akan jumpa, sebelah kiri. Dari Port Dickson lebih kurang setengah jam perjalanan.

Kat kedai tu ada yang dah siap-siap masak jadi bolehlah menjamu selera di situ.


*excuse the penyapu..malas nak crop

Rendang Itik Salai + Daging Salai Masak Lomak

Daging Salai Cicah Air Asam


Kami beli jugak daging dan ayam kampung salai yang belum dibuat lauk. Tuan kedai kata boleh tahan seminggu kalau disimpan dalam peti, dekat regrigerator compartment tu. Tapi dia kira half-cooked jelah, so nak kena masak jugak sebelum makan. Sebenarnya diorang ada jugak jual pes masak lemak tapi masa tu dah out of stock pulak.

Ayam tu aku buat masak lemak cili padi, okaylah. Daging aku buat masak merah, tapi rasanya tak berapa kena kot. Aku agak yang salai-salai ni kita kena masak dengan santan, macam masak lemak atau rendang, baru menjadi-jadi 😁😁

All in all, aku suka sangat rasa smoky daging, ayam dan itik salai tu. Dah teringin balik pulak rasanya.


Sunday, September 3, 2017

Mengalah Bukan Kalah

It was exhausting to be sleepless at night thinking about things you know you can do nothing about. It was a waste of everything - time, energy and even peace of mind. But I couldn't help it - feeling hopeless yet still trying to find a way to put a stop to it.

I wish I am stronger and wiser. 

But all I am is just an overthinking freak 😔